Wasted
I’ve had a lot of big changes happen the last five years, I’ve started a new job, left a job, sold a beloved house, moved in with a boyfriend, moved out of the boyfriend’s, moved twice more, bought a house, realized I was depressed and needed help, ex-boyfriend passed away and now shortly I’m about to start another new job.
In the past few weeks I’ve had time to reflect on who I am, what I want to accomplish and who I want to be when I grow up, and I’ve realized that somewhere along these past five years I lost myself and I stopped doing a lot of the things that really make me happy, want to wake up in the morning and smile my face off.
I’m not sure why I stopped or what I filled my time with, but I’m so grateful to have had this time to really step back and decide what habits I want to restart. There is no better time then now, right?
Now that my free time is quickly coming to an end, I feel as though I’ve wasted these past 4 months and I could have done much more and made this time matter. I’m now trying to stuff as much as I can in these last 10 days.
I love getting lost in a book and have recently become obsessed with non-fiction. In the past, murder mysteries and psychological thrillers were always my go to, but now I can’t get enough of this amazing world we live in and the people I’ll never meet. I’m so glad that my kindle is full and I have more books than I can read in one year. Right now I’m reading The Lost City of The Monkey God, it’s very similar to The Lost City of Z, but I love these true adventure stories. If I can’t travel to the ends of the earth, then at least I can read about them and imagine myself on these grand adventures.
Growing up my mom was very crafty and always had some sort of arts and crafts for me to work on. She was even my brownie troop leader when we lived in Hawaii. My mom is really really creative and amazing with a sewing machine. She grew up sewing her own clothes and I think still hopes I will start sewing and quilting one day. She signed me up for oil painting classes, we stamped our own valentines and Christmas cards, I used to have my own sweat shop and make all the relatives Christmas ornaments each year (my mom is one of 10 kids!) — I think I made ornaments for 8 or 9 years straight. Each year they were more and more complicated. This is another one of those things that I’m super proud to have had the chance to experience. It’s awesome that I can be crafty and nerdy when I want.
When I first moved to Denver, I really wanted to learn how to knit. Knitting and crocheting were the only two things my mom wasn’t a genius at. So I bought a few books and taught myself to knit. Since then, I’ve mastered hats, mittens and scarves. I think my family was seriously tired of getting knitted accessories from me at Christmas. It’s been a long while since I picked up my knitting needles and now there are so many great videos — anytime I forget how to do an SSK or any knit stitch, I can find 100 youtube videos and be on my way.
In a fun twist of events, just recently my mom has started knitting and taught herself how by watching several hours of PBS shows on knitting how tos. (She lives in Portland, otherwise of course I would have taught her!)
You know from my Intentional post that one of my goals this year is to knit a sweater…So this past weekend I signed up for a few classes at the Interweave Yarn Fest. Honestly, I didn’t know what to expect, but the expo was much smaller than I anticipated (which was good for my pocketbook) but the classes were AMAZING. I’ll write a full blog post on the classes I took later this week. So now with my new knitting skills, knowledge and inspiration, I’ve purchased yarn and a pattern! This is shocking because I have a fear of commitment and have never been able to commit to a color, a yarn, a fiber or a pattern before. I’ve not yet started the sweater, but I’m one step closer and should have some stitches on my needles soon. I hope to keep knitting for many years to come.
I have also started to make jewelry again and while I make jewelry I’ve started listening to podcasts — another thing I forgot I loved and feel like I am SO behind! I’ve eaten up Serial, How Things Work, This American Life, S Town, and even one from a new friend Yarn Thing by Marly Bird. I’ve made several pieces of jewelry that will make their way to friends this Christmas.
The cooking from scratch, the meditation, the running, and the connecting with my girlfriends are even more things that I’ve fallen in love with these past months. More on these later, I’m now off to finish a pair of knitted baby booties.
Go start a new habit NOW.